Saturday, June 23, 2012

Garage Sale Hell

Well now my tan is uneven. Two days of sitting in my driveway with no shade, selling my wares has ruined all my hard work at the pool. I'm not basking in the glorious sun while poolside. I'm sweltering amongst my tables of household item, tools, old fish tanks and a Sega Video Council with 6 games for one low price of ten bucks. What a hoot. Somebody pinch me I think I've died and gone to heaven. But why is it so hot here? Huh. I must be in Garage Sale hell. 
Yes, that would be the way to describe it. I guess I shouldn't complain we've made $5.50 so far today. I can buy a Venti Mocha at Starbucks with that kind of cash and leave a tip. The glass is half full.
By popping up that Garage Sale sign I've also left myself vulnerable to the kookamonga neighbors. I'm a sitting duck. We just had a lady here that instead of parking her car on the side of the road, which is Garage Sale protocol, she decided to pull into the driveway. Normally a car fits in a driveway, it's what they are for. But as I said earlier we have tables full of crap on each side. She thought, well maybe she didn't really put much thought into browsing while still in her car. She just did it. And she drove into our fish tank. Doh. This is a Garage Sale without a drive-thru. I don't know what she's use to in her own little world but I'm pretty sure my Home Owner Association forbids drive-thru windows.
Shortly after that woman a couple stopped by to shop and they spoke in another language while discussing the items on one of the tables. If you stop by my Garage Sale speak English the whole time you are here not just when you want to know if I'll take 10 cents for something that is priced 25 cents. And what do you want that pocket knife for anyway, you know they aren't going to let you on a plane with it.
Garage Sales make me cranky.


Venom said...

I can't get behind the logic of garage sales myself. I hate looking through someone's stuff while they watch me do it, and someone else pawing through my stuff makes my skin crawl. Even the stuff I don't want. I'd rather just donate it all than try to assess a value on my hand-me-downs.
Plus, I'm very fair. Sunburn is my nemesis.

Relax Max said...

Now now.

Sue said...

Venom - We have a garage sale about every 5 years. Always saying we'll never do it again. But we do, dumb.

Relax Max - I know, right?

Relax Max said...

I would never do that. I would take my chances with the deer first. Strange foreign people should not be on your property. Once they find out where you live, who knows?

Relax Max said...

Do you know anything about Onan? (not to change the subject) Not Kofi, the Bible guy.