Friday, October 15, 2010

Hey HannahJ, I'm going to say retard in another post

I had a half inch by half inch piece of paper burning a hole in my pocket all morning. This little microscopic piece of paper said I could receive a free medium french fry. How awesome is that? I received this golden ticket on my McDonald's large Mocha with whole milk this morning when I stopped at the drive-thru for my Friday Egg McMuffin. I sat at my desk going through my emails, eating my Egg McMuffin, not interrupted by the phone and that's a sign of a good day, drinking my mocha wondering how can it get any better than this. That's when I found 2 little stickers on my paper cup with a lid. "What do we have here?"
I'm not oblivious to the world around me, but I have to admit I'm clueless in the McDonald's Monopoly Game world. I've just chosen not to participate in the past. But when I peeled off that winning french fry ticket I decided to throw myself into the game. I have a game board now.
I watched the clock all day waiting to cash in my winnings and get more pieces to my new obsession. Lunch time came, I had to go to the bank first. There are obstacles in life, we all have them. They teach us patience, compassion, all sorts of lessons on our journey through life. It's what make us stronger, obstacles in life are thrown into our paths to test us, teach us, ground us in reality, help us grow into a descent human being if we chose to learn from them. My obstacle on my way to my free french fries was a moron who couldn't work the ATM machine.
How retarded to you have to be to leave your card in the ATM when on the screen it says. "Do you wish to make another transaction?" Your options are yes or no. Not, drive away from the machine without your card or receipt. I got up to the ATM and could have withdrawn my weekend craft show money from her account. But instead I thought real hard and then pushed the button that said NO. I'm so damn smart sometimes. I put Einstein's card on the ledge and use my own card to withdraw my money. I followed the instructions and Eureka, my card spit back out at me. I grabbed the other card and made an unscheduled stop in the bank. As soon as I opened the door three tellers and one morons heads snapped around. "Do you have my card?"
"Yes." Idiot.
I handed it over and walked out. I said nothing for fear I wouldn't pass my "life's little obstacle test". Plus I had free french fries waiting for me.


The Crabby Lady said...

McD Monopoloy is ADDICTIVE!

They suck you in with free fries. Then before you know it, you're visiting daily just so you can rip little soggy games pieces off a paper cup in hopes of getting a "fix".

My name is Deb. I am a McDonald's Monopoly Addict...

Relax Max said...

Wow. Walmart and McDonald's should be paying you for all the publicity.

I was trying really hard to think up an interesting pee story so I could fit in here, but was drawing a blank until last weekend when I was driving from Phoenix back to New Mexico and it is, like 5 hours, and I automatically developed a pee story for your blog. I don't know how much you know about the high desert in the midsection of Arizona on the way to New Mexico, but once you get out of cactus country and through the damn mountains, there isn't a whole lot of vegetation of any size to stand behind, if you get my drift. Well, you probably don't. Anyway my teeth had been floating (as you so delicately say) for about 100 miles when I finally made it to Holbrook and saw a McDonalds. There. I don't BUY anything at McDonalds hardly ever, but I USE McDonalds, so that should count for two points here. Pee one and McDonalds two. Oh, yes, like a racehorse.

I'm afraid it will take me more time to segue smoothly into ATM idiots, jury duty unfairness and squirrel dogs- especially if I must also keep up the underlying pee theme. You are hard to keep up with, but I'm trying.

Go with God, amiga.

(I did. He was standing next to me in the McDonalds loo.)

Leeuna said...

Wow! Who does that? Leaves their ATM card? It's a good thing you found it instead of someone dishonest. Maybe the lady learned her lesson.

Congrats on the free fries. Woot! I love to win stuff... especially food.

ReformingGeek said...

Great. Now I want fries with my spaghetti.

I'm glad you passed your life's obstacles test. I think that card might have been inserted where the sun don't shine...

Sue said...

Deb - Just what exactly to they put these little game pieces on? I got them on my mocha but nothing at lunch. WTH!

Relax Max - I am wildly impressed with the effort you but into your comments on my posts. You have a wonderful attention span and it's not everyone that can keep up with me, in fact you are probably the only one that can.

Leeuna - I'm on my way for a shot at more free fries tomorrow, wish me luck.

Carol - Yes, she gave me another erranc on my lunch hour. The whole concept of going to the drive-thru is to avoid going into the bank, her incompetence had me doing both. Why to I have to be so damn nice?

Anonymous said...

My youngest seems to win everything. I bought him a shake on the way home from school... he wins a cheeseburger. We all had McD for supper the other night... the only winner is again... yep... him... another cheeseburger.

If I thought I could get away with it, I'd take him to Vegas and make him play until he wins enough for me to retire. Somehow I think people would frown on that; he's only 14.

MikeWJ at Too Many Mornings said...

Why is that free fries can practically make us orgasmic? One of life's great mysteries.....

Sue said...

fracas - Maybe if you got him a fake mustache......?

Mike - You are so sweet, 3 three comments on 3 different post. I'm going to try for free fries tomorrow. Wish me luck.