Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Jury Duty Part 1, maybe the only part

Okay, I'm officially scared, I just saw convicts. Honest to God, orange striped jumpsuit in handcuffs, convicts. And there's a lot of them, I'm not getting out of here anytime soon. I knew I should have worn my Rush Limbaugh T-shirt.
The convicts were out in the hallway and so are the bathrooms, so I've stopped drinking my water and there will be no coffee for me even if it's free. They give you free tokens and validate your parking.
I parked way to far away, 2 blocks. If it's raining when I leave, I'm screwed. I just drove into a parking garage hoping it was close to the court house. 2 blocks away, I'm an idiot. The 8:30 arrival time is loosely observed. I don't think we are going to start until 9:00. The 8:30 time is for us country bumpkins that can't negotiate the big city. I really, really hope I can find my car if I ever get to leave. The husband called when I first got here, he knows all too well that I could have easily ended up in Pennsylvania. He had to check to see if I made it into the Jury Assembly Room. Being directionally retarded, I've cost him a few gray hairs. But I put full trust in the GPS lady, except for the time she wanted me to drive off a bridge, she has never failed me. I also had my map quest map and we all know that those are never wrong, I was in good hands.
I must look like a geek in this Jury Assembly Room, they probably think I'm taking notes on the video they are showing us. What a group of happy people I'm sitting with. I want to go home.
It's only a matter of time before I start making up names and attaching stories to them. I've already picked out "I'm above all this" lady. She's so much better than the rest of us. I have to pee. The bailiff is now fielding phone calls from the people that haven't shown up. Apparently you can come in the next day if you have a good enough excuse and can fax in a doctors excuse.
Wait, somethings happening.
The first group was called and I'm not in it, either is "I'm above all this" lady. Groups are starting to form and people are starting to talk, I've chosen to observe and keep to myself. This ends part 1 of my Jury Duty experience.
Stay tuned.


ReformingGeek said...

Hee Hee. I know you're having fun.

There is always an "above all this" person or persons and a person who can't stop using their phone even when the bailiff asks them to put it away.

Yeah. 8:30 means 9:00 at the earliest.

Glad you made it there OK!

Relax Max said...

I guess you meant northeast Ohio.

Well, they'll give you a number to call a recording every evening to see if there's a trial the next day. But I guess you haven't even been grilled by the attorneys yet so you are not that far along. They may not even use you. You are just a pool right now.

I hope you don't get sequestered. And I hope you don't get hooked up with a fellow juror who insists on eating all the donuts and won't deliberate with the rest of you.

Not to worry - they always make a plea deal at the last minute the night before the trial. A time waster. Park closer. They can't give you a parking ticket if you are on jury duty.

Leeuna said...

Glad you made it but hope you don't get picked to serve...that is unless you want to. I never did. Oh and here in our little hick town they take away your cell phone before they allow you to pass through the metal detector and you can't have it until you leave the court house. That really sucks. You're stranded in the middle of all those people without a life line to the outside world.

Candice said...

I'm also extremely directionally challenged, as I've always thought that any direction that I'm currently facing is North.

Sue said...

Carol - I made it there okay. I was less nervous than I was when I went 4 years ago, didn't have my GPS then.

Relax Max - Yes I was in the pool, never had the pleasure of being grilled by attorneys. My plan was to park close but I panicked. It's the country bumpkin coming out of me I suppose.

Leeuna - I would have been climbing the walls if they took away my cell phone, stuck in a room for God knows how long with those people. Yikes!

Cancice - You're in Texas, so you are right most of the time you are facing North. I'm in Ohio so most of the time I'm facing West. That's how it works right?

Anonymous said...

"the GPS lady, except for the time she wanted me to drive off a bridge, she has never failed me"

Sorry... not to minimize your jury duty, but that one line had me cracking up, remembering how that same GPS lady had us INCREDIBLY lost in Calgary... at rush hour. I think she's secretly that mother nature bitch who shows up everywhere giving women their monthly gift.

MikeWJ at Too Many Mornings said...

Convicts are scary. Unless you've locked yourself out of your car. Then they can be very useful indeed. But that's another story.

Sue said...

fracas - The GPS lady and Mother Nature, hmmmmm............ you know you never see them in the same place at the same time. You might be on to something.

Mike - When there's is a long line if them on orange stripped jump suits, chained together, out numbering the guards - I'm staing far, far away.