Friday, January 14, 2011

One of these things is not like the other, one of these things just isn't the same.

Generally I like to sit by myself when I go to lunch, find a secluded table, eat and write. Problem was, I walked into McDonald's with a blank slate in my brain. 'I have to sit by someone weird.' I told myself. Eureka! A table full. A table full of a really out of place, over dressed, family, 3 generations of the entitled. And when I sat near them, they kicked it up a notch.

'Awesome, please try to impress me.' Inside voice. In fact my inside voice was going a mile a minute.

I quickly arranged my lunch tray. For some reason McDonald's has stopped asking me "for here or to go" and they automatically put my food in a bag. Then I say, "I was planning on staying is that okay?"
"Of course." And they put my bag of food on a tray. I look like a swindler trying to get out of the "for here" tax as I go find a table.

There was grandma and grandpa, mom and dad and two daughters. The daughters had a few years between them, the oldest never stopped texting and the chubby younger one loved every food that came up in conversation. Grandma and mom were bejeweled, made up, half a can of hair spray on each head and in designer clothes, their purses were probably expensive but I'm not schooled in the designer purse world, and every once in a while I could get a whiff of grandma smell. Dad and grandpa discussed at length a deli menu, "The sandwiches are this big. And the Matzah balls.............."

"I love Matzah balls." Chubby girl chimed in.

When the deli menu conversation was exhausted the dad started to try and impress the grandpa with his job. Grandpa didn't seem too interested which made dad try harder. The mom discussed dinner for the weekend, "I thought I'd make a pot pie tomorrow."

"I love pot pie." Of course you do.
One has to wonder why these people ended up in McDonald's when the could have gone to the deli that had sandwiches 'this big' and Matzah balls. It's going to bother me for a little bit. I hope I don't waste too many brain cells mulling this over.


Symdaddy said...

That is amazing! That happened to me just a while ago! At Burger King!!!

I couldn't impress 'grandpa' with tales of my job either.

I amazing how embarrassed you can get just by wearing a tie in that kind of place!

It mad me want to fart and pick my nose just so that I could fit in better ... but I took my tie off instead!

ReformingGeek said...

Dang. Now I'm hungry again.

They are at Micky-Dick's because Chubby wanted to go there. I can't imagine adults wanting to eat there.




Leeuna said...

I love Matzah balls, pot pies, deli sandwiches, McDonald's...

LOL at Symdaddy's comment.

Sue said...

Symdaddy - You can tell the difference between the people that stop there for lunch from work and the ones that find themselves in a foreign land.

Carol - Yes I'm sure it was chubby's fault. Hey! I just go for their fresh brewed ice tea, the fries are extra.

Leeuna - Please don't encourage Symdaddy, it's hard enough to keep him in check!

Relax Max said...

I must tell you I like your McDonalds posts even better than your Walmart posts. (Though, of course, not quite on a par with your famous scary Asian laundry people posts.)

I can't believe you are taking a creative writing course. You could teach one.

Woops. Different posts.

But you said I could combine, right?

I love pot pie. No I don't. I don't quite know what matza balls are. Hell, I don't even know what a matza is. A breed of dog? Anyway, we don't eat balls here.

Sue said...

Relax Max - When I get lazy, I'm using your comments as a post. I don't know what matza balls are either. I've seen them at WalMart. I'll check them out this weekend and report back to you. I don't want to eat balls either but if it's for my art............sacrifices must be made.