Wednesday, February 27, 2013

Yes, cabin fever has taken hold

They let me out of the house today. I really need to mingle amongst the general public a little more than just grocery shopping every Friday at WalMart. I talk to myself more than anyone else, I'm my own BFF. Usually I am a pretty interesting person to talk to, humorous, friendly and barely have any marbles missing. That's what I told myself the other day. But even I can get bored with me.
Yes, cabin fever has taken hold.
Today I went to the dentist. Let me ask, is it wrong to be jealous of the guy in the cubical next to you that is getting a prescription for Vicodin? I think you should be given a sedative the moment you walk into the dentist office doors. Or at least offered a cocktail. Instead I had to white knuckle the dentist chair arms while my teeth were scraped. There was a drill on the right of me and Vicodin talk to the left. There I was stuck in the middle fully alert.
After the torture I received my free toothbrush, travel size toothpaste and a mini dental floss. I made my next 6 month check up which will be in the summer and made a point of telling the ladies in the office that the next time I see them I will have on flip flops and please have the margaritas ready.
My next stop was to get my hair done. I just got it cut but I think I'm suppose to say done. This is another chore for me. I can not remember a time that I walked out of a hair salon and liked my hair. The stylist will give me a mirror when they are done cutting, twirl me around and ask if I like it and I always say 'yep it looks good'. But on the inside I'm telling myself 'I can fix this when I get home'. Because really what else can you do? It isn't like they can put your hair back on your head.
The next stop, mom and dads. I did this before I went home to fix my hair manly because it doesn't matter what I do my mother will not like it. I walked in the door and she said 'huh, it's short'. Told you. In all the pictures of me as a little girl my hair was in a ponytail stuck on top of my head, what did she expect from me as I took control of my own hair. I had nothing to look back on except to give up and look like a dork.
That was my day out of the house. Now I can only wait until I am let out again.

Friday, February 08, 2013

Sometimes you have to write stuff down

A couple years ago I snapped and wrote this scathing memo to my family. I'm sure everyone has had this problem, you need to write something down and can't find a piece of paper. I know I'm right on this conundrum.
I would place a pad of paper in the kitchen junk drawer. I thought, like many, this was a given. Pad of paper in junk drawer with pen and pencils. How could you go wrong? When you have to hurry up and write something down, bam, pad and pen at the ready.
But no, someone always takes the pad of paper leaving you running around the house, usually on the phone, trying to find a piece of paper to write down vital information. No matter how many times you scream at your family to leave it in its spot, it continually disappears.
I took matters into my own hands and threatened them,
"Bad things will happen if anyone removes this pad of paper from this spot!"
Exclamation point, underlined and I even drew a scary stick figure face so they knew I meant business. I left it there. It wasn't too long before they started to defile it, as you can see in the picture. And it has also become the paper on which you test a pen to see if it works. But with all the abuse it has taken over the years, it still remains in its spot. So yeah, they are scared of me, totally.